Source Page - 26

• [S129] John Alexander Martin, Military History of the Eighth Kansas Veteran Volunteer Infantry (Leavenworth, Kansas: Daily Bulletin Steam Book and Job Printing House, 1869), This early Kansas regimental history was penned by the colonel of the regiment. The 8th Kansas Volunteer Infantry was mustered into the service in August 1861 and fought in fifteen battles (including Perryville, Stones River, and Chickamauga) and eight skirmishes during the Civil War. During its service, the regiment traveled nearly 11,000 miles through twelve different states and was the only Kansas infantry regiment to serve beyond Missouri; Kansas State University Library, Rare Books Librarian, Special Collections, Manhattan, Pottawatomie County, Kansas, USA.
• [S196] Atchison Daily Champion March 23, 1865 - March 31, 1866 (Atchison, Kansas: Atchison County Kansas Genealogical Society, n.d); Richard Tonsing, 2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA.
• [S197] "Scrap-Book," John Alexander Martin (17), newspaper clippings, 1888-1889, Atchison, Kansas, held by Kansas Historical Society, 6425 SW 6th Ave, Topeka, Shawnee County, Kansas, USA, 39.056097, -95.775346, K 040 M36.
• [S206] Kansas State Historical Society and Department of Archives, History of Kansas Newspapers (Topeka, Kansas: State Printer, 1916); Richard Tonsing, 2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA.
• [S327] "Brown County, Kansas Candidate Page," database online, 28 December 1998, http:/169.147.169.151/kansas/genweb/brown/candidat.htm/, held by Owens, Lisa, Brown County, Kansas, USA.
• [S328] Unknown author, "Some Notes on the Wyandotte Constitutional Convention," Progress in Kansas, http:/http://www.kancoll.org/voices/1997/0197wyan.htm/, database online (28 December 1998), University of Kansas, Lawrence, Douglas County, Kansas, USA.
• [S329] "Museum of the Kansas National Guard -- Hall of Fame," 1998, http:/skyways.lib.ks.us/museums/kng/hof.html/, held by University of Kansas, Lawrence, Douglas County, Kansas, USA.
• [S453] Paul Gerhardt Tonsing (7), Twentieth Directory of Atchison City and County including Atchison, Huron, Lancaster, and Muscotah, Kansas a Complete List of the Patrons of the Rural Routes of Atchison County with a Compiled List of the Inhabitants, Business Firms, Officers, Educational, Benevolent, Social and Religious Institutions and Maps of the City and County (Atchison, Kansas: Tonsing, Paul G, 1913); Richard Tonsing, 2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA.
• [S476] Willis K Dunbar, Michigan Through the Centuries Family and Personal History (n.p: Lewis Hist. Pub. Co, n.d); Kansas Historical Society, 6425 SW 6th Ave, Topeka, Shawnee County, Kansas, USA, 39.056097, -95.775346.
• [S495] Interview with Rev. Dr. Ernest F Tonsing, by Dr. Ernst F Tonsing, 29 March 1986. Held by Ernst Frederick Tonsing (1284 Calle Almendro, Thousand Oaks, Ventura County, California, USA).
• [S499] James Smith, "The State of Kansas Certificate of Election," John Alexander Martin, Certificate of Election, 24 November 1884, held by Richard Tonsing, 2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA.
• [S513] "Scrap Book," John Alexander Martin (17), newspaper clippings, July 1884, held by Linn, Dot, 2400 S. MacArthur, #167, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma County, Oklahoma, USA.
• [S714] Death Certificate for Harres Crawford Martin, 1972, 44656, Texas Department of Health, Bureau of Vital Statistics, 1100 West 49th Street, Austin, Travis County, Texas, USA.
• [S730] 1930 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Atchison County, Kansas, National Archives and Records Administration, Washington, District of Columbia, USA, micropublication T-626 roll 693.
• [S746] Death Certificate for Paul Alexander Martin, 14 December 1964, 70155, Michigan Department of Community Health, Vital Records Requests, PO Box 20721, Lansing, Ingham County, Michigan, USA.
• [S943] "Daniel & Sandra Smitley () to Richard Tonsing". Held by Richard Tonsing (2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA).
• [S1089] 1930 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Osborne County, Kansas, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication T-626 roll 0714.
• [S1092] "Bob West (, e-mail address) to Richard Tonsing". Held by Richard Tonsing (2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA).
• [S1124] 1910 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Franklin County, Kansas, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication film T-624 roll 439.
• [S1138] 1900 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Douglas County, Nebraska, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication T-623 roll 924.
• [S1152] 1910 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Otoe County, Nebraska, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication T-624 roll 852.
• [S1159] 1910 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Multnomah County, Oregon, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication T-624 roll 1286.
• [S1204] 1920 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Otoe County, Nebraska, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication T-625 roll 997.
• [S1246] 1930 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Otoe County, Nebraska, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication T-626 roll 1288.
• [S1255] 1930 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Washington County, Oregon, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication T-626 roll 1957.
• [S1295] "Oregon Death Index, 1903-98," database online, 2000, http://www.Ancestry.com, held by Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA. Original data: State of Oregon. Oregon Death Index, 1903-98. Salem, Oregon: Filmed by the Oregon State Archives and Records Center, 1998-.
• [S1622] City Directory Atchison, Kansas 1923 Including Atchison County Directory Classified Directory Street Directory Numerical Directory (Springfield, Missouri: Dunham Directory Company, 1923); Richard Tonsing, 2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA.
• [S1668] "Joe Marshall (, e-mail address) to Richard Tonsing". Held by Richard Tonsing (2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA).
• [S1816] "Stephanie Gilbert (, e-mail address) to Richard Tonsing". Held by Richard Tonsing (2421 Rogue River Dr, Sacramento, Sacramento County, California, USA).
• [S2005] Ancestry.com, "Kansas State Census Collection, 1905," [database online], 2009, Provo, Utah, http://www.Ancestry.com, held by Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA. Original data: 1905 Kansas State Census. Microfilm reels K-1 - K-181. Kansas State Historical Society.
• [S2006] Ancestry.com, "Kansas State Census Collection, 1915," [database online], 2009, Provo, Utah, http://www.Ancestry.com, held by Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA. Original data: 1915 Kansas State Census. Microfilm reels K-1 – K-271. Kansas State Historical Society.
• [S2108] Ancestry.com, "Selected U.S. Federal Census Non-Population Schedules, 1850-1880," [database online], 2010, Provo, Utah, http://www.Ancestry.com, held by Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA. Original data: Nonpopulation Census Schedules for California, 1850-1880. Microfilm. The Bancroft Library, University of California, Berkeley. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Illinois, 1850-1880 (NARA microfilm publication T1133, rolls 1-11, 13-56). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Iowa, 1850-1880 (NARA microfilm publication T1156, 49 rolls). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Non-population Census Schedules for Kansas, 1850-1880 (NARA microfilm publication T1130, rolls 1-2, 5, 8-41). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Maine, 1850-1880. Microfilm. Maine State Archives, Augusta. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Massachusetts, 1850-1880 (NARA microfilm publication T1204, rolls 1-8, 11-16, 18-22, 24-32). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Michigan, 1850-1880 (in the custody of the Michigan State Archives), 1850-1880 (NARA microfilm publication T1164, rolls 1-13, 16-25, 28-68). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Nebraska, 1860-1880 (NARA microfilm publication T1128, rolls 1-13). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for New York, 1850-1880. Microfilm. New York State Library, Documents and Digital Collections, Albany. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for North Carolina, 1850-1880: Mortality and Manufacturing (NARA microfilm publication M1805, 9 rolls). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Agriculture schedules (South Carolina) 1850-1880. Microfilm F 600204, 15 rolls. South Carolina Department of History and Archives, Columbia. Industry/manufacturers schedules (South Carolina) 1850-1880. Microfilm F 600206, 2 rolls. South Carolina Department of History and Archives, Columbia. Social statistics schedules (South Carolina) 1850-1880. Microfilm F 600207, 2 rolls. South Carolina Department of History and Archives, Columbia. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Texas, 1850-1880 (NARA microfilm publication T1134, rolls 2-49). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Virginia, 1850-1880 (NARA microfilm publication T1132, rolls 1-8, 11-15, 17, 20-32). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C. Nonpopulation Census Schedules for Washington Territory, 1860-1880 (NARA microfilm publication A1154, rolls 1-2, 4-7). Records of the Bureau of the Census, Record Group 29. National Archives, Washington, D.C.
• [S2291] 1900 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Preble County, Ohio, Ancestry.Com, MyFamily.com, Inc., 575 Howard St, San Francisco, San Francisco County, California, USA, micropublication T-623 roll 1315.
• [S2412] Oregonian, (Portland, Oregon), GenealogyBank, P.O. Box 219, Chester, Windsor County, Vermont, USA.
• [S2461] Kansas constitution. Copy of the constitution adopted by the convention at Wyandot, for the State of Kansas. February 10, 1860. -- Referred to the Committee on Territories, and ordered to be printed. , Publication: Serial Set Vol. No.1060; Report: H.Misc.Doc. 6 (Washington, District of Columbia: House of Representatives, February 10, 1860); GenealogyBank, P.O. Box 219, Chester, Windsor County, Vermont, USA.
• [S2463] Message of the President of the United States, and accompanying documents, to the two Houses of Congress, at the commencement of the second session of the Thirty-ninth Congress , Serial Set Vol. No.1285; Report: H.Exec.Doc. 1 pt. 3 (Washington, District of Columbia: House of Representatives, June 19, 1866); GenealogyBank, P.O. Box 219, Chester, Windsor County, Vermont, USA.
• [S2464] Journal of the executive proceedings of the Senate of the United States of America from March 5, 1869, to March 3, 1871, inclusive. Vol. XVII. , Senate Executive Proceedings Vol. 17 (Washington, District of Columbia: Senate, 1869-03-05); GenealogyBank, P.O. Box 219, Chester, Windsor County, Vermont, USA.
• [S2465] Joseph Anderson. March 24, 1869. -- Ordered to be printed and recommitted. , Serial Set Vol. No.1403; Report: H.Rpt. 1 (Washington, District of Columbia: House of Representatives, March 24, 1869); GenealogyBank, P.O. Box 219, Chester, Windsor County, Vermont, USA.
• [S2466] Report of the Commissioner of Agriculture for the year 1871. , Serial Set Vol. No.1522; Report: H.Exec.Doc. 327 (Washington, District of Columbia: House of Representatives, 1872-01-01); GenealogyBank, P.O. Box 219, Chester, Windsor County, Vermont, USA.
• [S2467] The national celebration of the centennial anniversary of the independence of the United States by an international universal exhibition, to be held in Philadelphia in the year 1876. Report to Congress by the United States Centennial Commission, February, 1873; accompanied by a classified compilation of the journal of the proceedings of the Commission and other papers , Serial Set Vol. No.1572; Report: H.Misc.Doc. 99; (Washington, District of Columbia: House of Representatives, 1873-01-01); GenealogyBank, P.O. Box 219, Chester, Windsor County, Vermont, USA.
• [S2468] Journal of the proceedings of the United States Senate in executive session. (First session, Forty-third Congress, commencing December 1, 1873.) , Senate Executive Proceedings Vol. 19; (Washington, District of Columbia: Senate, 1873-12-02); GenealogyBank, P.O. Box 219, Chester, Windsor County, Vermont, USA.
• [S2469] National Home for Disabled Soldiers. Annual report of the Board of Managers of the National Home for Disabled Volunteer Soldiers for the year 1878. February 28, 1879. -- Referred to the Committee on Military Affairs and ordered to be printed. , Serial Set Vol. No.1863; Report: H.Misc.Doc. 28 (Washington, District of Columbia: House of Representatives, February 28, 1879).
• [S2470] Investigation of the National Home for Disabled Volunteer Soldiers. March 3, 1885. -- Ordered to be printed. , Serial Set Vol. No.2329; Report: H.Rpt. 2676 (Washington, District of Columbia: House of Representatives, March 3, 1885).
• [S2550] 1920 U.S. Census (Population Schedule), Tarrant County, Texas, National Archives and Records Administration, Washington, District of Columbia, USA, micropublication T-625 roll 1850.
• [S2649] "8th Kansas Monument North Crest," 111 N Crest Rd, Chatanooga, Hamilton, TN, held by 8th Kansas Monument North Crest, 8th Kansas Monument North Crest, 111 N Crest Rd, Chickamauga and Chattanooga National Military Park, Hamilton County, Tennessee, USA, 35.036667,-85.254444.
• [S2650] "8th Kansas Monument Orchard Knob," 1800-1898 E 4th St, Chatanooga, Hamilton, TN, held by 8th Kansas Monument Orchard Knob, 8th Kansas Monument Orchard Knob, 1800-1898 E 4th St, Chickamauga and Chattanooga National Military Park, Hamilton County, Tennessee, USA, 35.040000,-85.272778. THE 8TH KANSAS VOL INFTY
  COL. JOHN A MARTIN, COMMANDING
  1ST BRIGADE, GEN. AUGUST WILLICH
  3RD DIVISION, GEN. T. J. WOOD
  4TH A. C. GEN. GORDON GRANGER
  NOVEMBER 23, 1863
  moved on this point at 2 o'clock P.M. from
  the railroad track in front of Fort Wood
  as skirmishers for the brigade and supported
  by the brigade captured this knob and line
  of works without much resistance and before
  the main line arrived.
  The regiment remained in this position until
  3 O'clock when it moved with the brigade to
  assault the enemy's works at the foot
  of Missionary Ridge.
  (8th Kansas monument in Orchard Knob)
  THE 8TH KANSAS VOL INFTY
  COL. JOHN A MARTIN, COMMANDING
  1ST BRIGADE, GEN. AUGUST WILLICH
  3RD DIVISION, GEN. T. J. WOOD
  4TH A. C. GEN. GORDON GRANGER
  NOVEMBER 23, 1863
  moved on this point at 2 o'clock P.M. from
  the railroad track in front of Fort Wood
  as skirmishers for the brigade and supported
  by the brigade captured this knob and line
  of works without much resistance and before
  the main line arrived.
  The regiment remained in this position until
  3 o'clock when it moved with the brigade to
  assault the enemy's works at the foot
  of Missionary Ridge.
  (8th Kansas monument in Orchard Knob).
• [S2651] "8th Kansas Volunteer Infantry Monument," Highway 27 North of Viniard Rd. Across from Heg Menorial., Chickamauga, Catoosa, GA, held by 8th Kansas Volunteer Infantry Monument, 8th Kansas Volunteer Infantry Monument, Highway 27 North of Viniard Rd. Across from Heg Menorial., Chickamauga and Chattanooga National Military Park, Catoosa County, Georgia, USA, 34.904444,-85.261111. 8TH KANSAS INFANTRY
  (front) 3RD BRIGADE, 1ST. DIV., 20TH CORPS
  THE EIGHTH KANSAS VOL. INFTY.
  (rear) COL. JOHN A. MARTIN, CQMMANDING
  HEG'S BRIGADE, DAVIS’ DIVISION, MCCOOK'S CORPS
  On Sept. 19th, went into action east of this point and was in
  the hottest part of the battle from 12:30 until 6:00 p.m. Col. Heg
  was killed, Col. Martin assumed command of the brigade, and Lieut.
  Col. J. L. Abernathy commanded the regiment. The fighting during
  this day was severe. The ground where this monument stands was
  repeatedly occupied by the opposing forces. At the close of the
  day the regiment bivouacked west of the Viniard House. During the
  night the division moved to the high ground west of the Crawfish
  Springs road and north of Widow Glenn's. Sept. 20th, at 12 o'clock
  the brigade went into action on the Brotherton Farm, but was soon
  forced to retire to McFarland's Gap. The division rejoined Gen.
  Thomas at 6:00 p.m.
  Total number engaged - — — — - — — — 406
  Loss: 2 Commissioned Officers killed
  9 Commissioned Officers wounded
  28 Enlisted men killed
  156 Enlisted men wounded
  35 Enlisted men missing
  Total loss 220. 54.19 per cent.
  Monument at Viniards.
• [S2652] "8th Kansas Volunteer Marker near Viniard,".11 miles NE from Viniard Rd., Chickamauga, Catoosa, GA, held by 8th Kansas Volunteer Marker near Viniard, 8th Kansas Volunteer Marker near Viniard, Walk through woods .11 miles NE from Viniard Rd. There is no clear trail as shown on map., Chickamauga and Chattanooga National Military Park, Catoosa County, Georgia, USA, 34.905000,-85.255556. Structure #807. Eighth Kansas Infantry Volunteer Regiment marker
  The marker was placed on the battlefield by the veterans in commemoration of
  their participation in the Battkaof Chickamauga, Sept. 19-20, 1863, and stands
  east of the Viniard field to mark its position on Sept. l9, l863, at 12:30 p.m
  The marker was erected after 1910, exact date unknown by Smith Granite Co. of
  Westerly, RI. Coat is unknown.
  Significance: 3rd
  Treatment: Preservation
  Latitude: 34°54'14"; 34°54'42"
  Longitude: 85°15'35"; 85°14'35."
• [S2653] "8th Kansas Volunteer Position Marker," In woods behind Brotherton Cabin 739'. South of Dyer Rd. along fence line, 28' inside fence line, Chickamauga, Catoosa, GA, held by 8th Kansas Volunteer Position Marker, 8th Kansas Volunteer Position Marker, In woods behind Brotherton Cabin 739'. South of Dyer Rd. along fence line, 28' inside fence line., Chickamauga and Chattanooga National Military Park, Catoosa County, Georgia, USA, 34.915833,-85.262500. Structure #808. Eighth Kansas Infantry Volunteer Regiment marker
  The marker was placed on the battlefield by the veterans in commemoration of
  their participation in the Battle of Chickamauga, Sept. 19-20, 1863, and stands
  in Brotherton field to mark its position on Sept. 20, 1863, at 12:00 noon.
  The marker was erected by Smith Granite Co., of Westerly, RI, after l9l0, exact
  date unknown. Cost is also unknown.
  Significance: 3rd
  Treatment: Preservation
  Latitude: 34°54'42"; 34°55'10"
  Longitude: 85°16'20"; 85°15'55."
• [S2654] "Heg Shell Pyramid," Heg Shell Pyramid, Chickamauga, Catoosa, GA, held by Heg Shell Pyramid, Heg Shell Pyramid, Chickamauga and Chattanooga National Military Park, Catoosa County, Georgia, USA, 34.903611,-85.262222. Structure #808. Eighth Kansas Infantry Volunteer Regiment marker
  The marker was placed on the battlefield by the veterans in commemoration of
  their participation in the Battle of Chickamauga, Sept. 19-20, 1863, and stands
  in Brotherton field to mark its position on Sept. 20, 1863, at 12:00 noon.
  The marker was erected by Smith Granite Co., of Westerly, RI, after l9l0, exact
  date unknown. Cost is also unknown.
  Significance: 3rd
  Treatment: Preservation
  Latitude: 34°54'42"; 34°55'10"
  Longitude: 85°16'20"; 85°15'55."

• Previous Page
• Next Page

This work by Richard Tonsing is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License. Please attribute the work to this site using the formats in either Lackey's "Cite Your Sources" or Mills' "Evidence."

 2nd Law of Thermodynamics: Chaos will Reign.

• 31.69 nHz = once a year.
• A bristlecone pine is just a fire's way of making another fire.
• A mathematician is a machine for converting coffee into theorems.
• A red sign on the door of a physics professor: 'If this sign is blue, you're going too fast.'
• A vibration is a motion that can't make up its mind which way it wants to go.
• Actually officer, if you factor in the earth's rotation, we were all speeding.
• All that glitters has a high refractive index.
• As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain. And as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. - Einstein
• Barium: What you do with dead chemists.
• Be careful with water -- it's full of hydrogen and oxygen!
• Biology grows on you.
• Black holes suck.
• Color... it's just a pigment of your imagination.
• Einstein never accepted quantum mechanics because of this element of chance and uncertainty. He said: God does not play dice. It seems that Einstein was doubly wrong. The quantum effects of black holes suggests that not only does God play dice, He sometimes throws them where they cannot be seen.
  
  — Steven Hawking
• Entropy - it's a tough job, but somebody's got to undo it.
• Entropy isn't what it used to be.
• Entropy: Not just a fad, it's the future!
• Geologists rock your world.
• Geology: Subduction leads to Orogeny.
• Gravity isn't MY fault--I voted for velcro!
• Gravity... not just a good idea: It's the law.
• If it doesn't work, it's physics.
• If it's 0 degrees today, and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow...how cold will it be?
• If it's green or it wiggles, it's biology.
• If it stinks, it's chemistry.
• "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
  
  — Thomas Alva Edison
• I like angles, but only to a degree.
• If the Earth is the size of a pea in New York, then the Sun is a beachball 50m away, Pluto is 4km away, and the next nearest star is in Tokyo. Now shrink Pluto's orbit into a coffee cup, then our Milky Way Galaxy fills North America.
• If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
• In The Beginning there was nothing, which exploded.
• It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.
• Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak...
• May the torque be about you.
• Nature abhors a vacuum. So does my sister's dog.
• Particle physicists are always trying to hold a meeting, but whenever they decide on a place, the time changes.
• Photons have mass!? I didn't even know they were Catholic...
• "Push to test." (click) "Release to detonate."
• Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
• Resolving a transformation is like cleaning a barn - it's hard to get started, but when you're good and dirty, you might as well keep going.
• Scientists have discovered that time is not real, that we only live in the current moment. But then according to that, they haven't done the research, and don't have anything to back them up.
• Scientists have shown that the moon is moving away at a tiny yet measurable distance from the earth every year. If you do the math, you can calculate that 85 million years ago the moon was orbiting the earth at a distance of about 35 feet from the earth's surface. This would explain the death of the dinosaurs. The tallest ones, anyway.
• Snackmosphere: The 95% air inside a bag of chips.
• That's the whole problem with science. You've got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder. - Calvin (& Hobbes)
• The Benoit/Blamey Theory of Thermo-Sock-Dynamics: Why bother to do laundry, when the inevitable loss of a sock will just increase entropy and contribute to the eventual heat death of the universe anyway?
• The law of gravity says, "no fair jumping without coming down"
• The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not "Eureka!" but "That's funny..."' - Isaac Asimov
• There is no gravity. Earth sucks!
• The square root of three equals two for large values of three. - found in a bathroom in the Cornell Physics department
• The Three Laws Of Thermodynamics First Law: You can't win. Second Law: You can't break even. Third Law: You can't even get out of the game.
• "Today, everybody remembers Galileo. How many can name the bishops and professors who refused to look through his telescope?"
  
  — James Hogan, Mind Matters
• To most people solutions mean finding the answers but to chemists solutions are things that are still all mixed up...
• Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.
• What happens if a big asteroid hits the Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad.
  
  — Dave Barry
• When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with the buttered side facing down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat. The two will hover, spinning inches above the ground. With a giant buttered cat array, a high-speed monorail could easily link New York with Chicago.
• When they broke open molecules, they found they were only stuffed with atoms. But when they broke open atoms, they found them stuffed with explosions.