Humeston Leap Year Market Report



LEAP YEAR MARKET REPORT

From the Humeston New Era of Feb. 1884:

The value attached to each article below has been corrected to date by our lady correspondent who has spent years abroad in fitting herself for this arduous duty. How well she has done it, be you judge.
We, present the names of the bachelors of this vicinity, warning the ladies not to be too particular as the biped is extremely scarce:

GEO. AULT - Canvassing agent, rather lazy, lover of women, fortune to be made, wears a collar and is fleshy complexioned..

WILL STEELE - Best side of 32, miller, industrious, strict church member, good disposition, don't like cats, is thought by many contracted for.

MACK BARRY - Brunette, farmer by reputation, industrious might be tempted by a good opportunity, to contract.

GEO. HENDERSON - Druggist, blonde, good looking, is doing well, good skater, inclined to squint a little, worth $5,000, good chance, ladies take note.

ART GELPIN - Blonde, 20 years operator, is said to be a good magnetic doctor, second hand article, fortune to be made, Western Union Telegraph Company has it.

HENRY MIDDLEBROOK - Age 24, homely, but good, complexion white, strictly business, skating rink manager and everyone's friend, and will succomb if the right one speaks.

WORD MOSHER - Hotel clerk, 24 years, energetic boy willing to quit the hotel to go with a good wife.

FRANK AULT - Farmer, 20, industrious, will be rich sometime, bashful, but as this is Leap Year, he will leave the brotherhood.

GENE SHEPARD - Railroad man 21, blond, bashful (?) likes "the girl" will make an enjoyable companion to sail o'er life's trouble sea but will "down breaks" if the wrong one should apply, be cautious girls.

DON HENRY - Merchant, energetic, 25, has just the sweetest mustache in town, will be an obedient husband, if shaken before taken and then handled with care.

AL DUNHAM - Hotel proprietor, 25, newcomer, quite fair to gaze on, needs a wife badly, but is nearly out of the notion.

J.H. BARRY - Farmer, 56, quite wealthy, $40 watch and money in the bank, and is just as young as he used to be, will take a good one to catch him.

WM. SPURGIN - "Graynette", grocer, 64, energetic, well-to-do, but most likely is "Katied" for life.

ELMER BLACK - Brunette, 21, farmer and trader, good looking, tall, stooping with hacking cough, is in the market and in good condition if not too long postponed, it'll be all right.

D. AVERY - Farmer, jolly fellow, in delicate health, only weighs 240 pounds, large chance.

WILFORD MOSHER - Farmer, 21 candidate for matrimoney, hard to suit, give him a trial.

CORD COGILL- Blonde, jockey and horse trainer, some money, will marry if he has to.

F.G. WEARY - Doctor, 24 years used up, blonde, good practice, inclined to be bashful, but never theless good, not very susceptable, if not wholly gone might be spoken for.

ENOS RICHMAN - Blacksmith, 32, wants to marry a widow with a boy large enough to carry a bucket of coal, don't wear a collar, cuts his hair short.

JIM LYNCH - Aged 19, clerk, homely but good, is the woman's friend, has skating mind, some money, and is ready for fun.

JAMES SAVELY - Farmer, 2, good trotter, good looker, and a good fellow, complexion short, wants to go into the hotel busness.

WILL MATTOX - Farm clerk, a little wild will tame easy if the right one bids.

WILLIE ZAUN - Meat carver, 21, is likely to become rich, catch on girls.

O.H. AULT - Blonde, school marm, 22, rather good looking (?) a favorite among the maids, muctache, thrifty, is not likely to leave the brother hood this year as his fortune is but a misty dream of the future.

CHAS. MEEKER - Merchant, 22, tall, handsome, blonde, fine physique and wants to marry, no bad habits, not wealthy but has an abundance of leisure time, can call on "his folks" eight nights a week.

By Martha Manning

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